I’ve wanted to go to the Geneva International Motor Show for some time now. Being the professional procrastinator that I am, it took me 18 years to actually do it.

Before packing the wife and kids into the car and subjecting them to yodeling chocolate cows on the sides of mountains, I consulted a map to see how far this drive would be. It would take us four and half hours, according to Google, going from one side of Switzerland all the way to the other.

What I didn’t realize was that we would be going from one part where I could almost understand them (Swiss German) to another where I was totally lost (Swiss French). Even the exit signs on the motorways (Autobahn? Autoroute?) changed, going from Ausfahrt to Sortie. At least the songs on the radio stayed in English.

The auto show is held at the Palexpo by the Geneva airport. The hotel where we stayed near the lake gave us public transportation passes for the city. We were able to walk to the train station and take it one stop to the auto show. In Europe, it is not ironic to take public transportation to an auto show.

The auto shows in Europe can get pretty crowded, as was the case here. We went on the opening weekend. There were a few booths, like Ferrari, that I never even got close to because of the crowds. When I did venture in these crowded areas, I was caught in a swell of people that I had to fight through. One such area had Bugatti, Koenigsegg, Lamborghini, Bentley, Pagani, and Porsche right next to each other. It was almost impossible to move through that mass of people.

I focused on cars that I don’t normally see in America. I also have the usual pictures of random things that I just find interesting.

Koenigsegg

I’ve been obsessing with the Swedish Koenigsegg recently. It’s why I came to Geneva. And it’s the reason why I still believe in the traditional American dream of getting wealthy—win the lottery, sue a big company, or inherit a large fortune. For Koenigsegg, I may need to do all three.

I admire the company for its innovate approaches, obsession for weight reduction, and gobs of horsepower.

The Agera RS, introduced last year, makes 1160 hp on regular pump gas while having a curb weight of only 1,395 kg (3,069 lb). It probably gets better gas mileage than my car, too.

The Agera One of 1 is a special series (“Agera Final”), of which 3 will be made (and are already sold). Its performance is closer to the One:1 introduced in Geneva back in 2014. Like the One:1, it has a 5.0 liter V8 engine boasting 1 megawatt of power (1360 hp), but this Agera weighs 20 kg more at 1,380 kg (3,036 lb). Time for a driver diet.

The new 2016 Regera is a sort of hybrid, combining electric motors with the 5.0 liter engine for 1500 hp and a curb weight of 1,628 kg (3,582 lb). Man, batteries are heavy.

It has three electric motors and one transmission gear through its Koenigsegg Direct Drive (KDD) transmission. It has a final drive ratio of 2.85:1 for a top speed of 249 mph. All interesting stuff for a $1.9 million car, essentially a two-door Honda Accord plug-in hybrid.

Also, Christian von Koenigsegg, the founder, will probably slap me for calling this a hybrid.

Koenigsegg Agera RS
A typical, run-of-the-mill Agera RS in Loke Yellow

Koenigsegg One of 1
This One of 1 is the first of 3.

Koenigsegg Regera
The new Regera showing off that it can open and close remotely, like through a smart phone.
Also, totally not like a Honda Accord plug-in hybrid.

Koenigsegg One:1 model
As an adult who hasn’t quite grown up yet, I found this model of the One:1 as interesting as the real cars.
It wouldn’t surprise me if it had a running motor.

TheFerrari

This is as close as I got to Ferrari. I was too tired to try to fight through the crowd to get a glimpse. Maybe the LaFerrari was there. Who knows.

Ferrari stand at Geneva
Someplace over there is a red car

Pagani

I think the Pagani Huayra BC (for Benny Caiola, a customer) looks better than the Koenigsegg, but I would still go with the Koenigsegg. The Huayra BC, with a 6.0 liter, twin-turbocharged AMG V12 that produces a mere 789 bhp, weighs just 1,218 kg (2,680 lb). All 20 of the €2.3 million cars are sold, so don’t bother lining up for one.

Pagani Huayra BC
This reminds me of a beetle taking flight

Bugatti

It was tough to get a good shot of the new Bugatti Chiron. The best I could do was hold the camera high over the crowds and shoot down. I found the headlights intriguing, because the U.S. typically has archaic headlight laws. I haven’t followed these laws in a while, and I’m assuming they’ll be fine for the U.S.

At $2.6 million for 1500 hp, I’m not personally going to worry about it.

Bugatti Chiron
Someplace over there is a blue car

Bugatti Chiron
Who are all these people in the booth?

Bugatti Chiron
Is there such a thing as square angel eyes/halos?

Lamborghini

Getting a good shot of the new Centenario was also difficult. Maybe because I couldn’t get a good angle on it, I was left unimpressed by the new Lamborghini. (Not that my opinion really matters, but I like the Reventón better.) With a V12 making 770 hp, it’s the most powerful car Lamborghini has produced. At $1.9 million, it’s also cheaper than the Bugatti Chiron. Buy two. If you can.

Lamborghini Centenario
After knocking over some old guy with a cane and shoving some little kid with a lollipop,
this was the best shot I could get of the front.

Lamborghini Centenario
I think Lamborghini was trying to out-do the Honda Civic Type-R in the back

The Rest

Crowded?

A little bit.

2016 Salon international de l’automobile de Genève
Palexpo Halls 4-7

2016 Internationale Automobil-Salon Genf
I’d like to go that way, please.

2016 Geneva International Motor Show
Even the Renault booth was crowded

Honda Civic Type-R

As a Subaru STI owner, I must admit to some spoiler envy here.

Honda Civic Type R
There’s a lot going on back there

Ruf

I like Ruf, technically a German automobile manufacturer. I hope it continues to be successful. What I liked about this car is the Porsche Club of America Club Racing sticker on the side.

Ruf
I wonder if this is the same yellow as the original Yellow bird.

ItalDesign

Many companies were showing off their abilities with design concepts. ItalDesign had this car, the GTZero. What I found interesting was their implementation of the “camera instead of side mirrors” concept. I like how it sticks out a bit like little wings without looking like useless Tyrannosaurus Rex-like arms.

ItalDesign GTZero
ItalDesign GTZero
Same car (GTZero), different white balance

Alfa Romeo

I have a soft-spot for Alfa Romeo wheels. And Alfa Romeo in general.

Alfa Romeo Disco Volante Spyder
But I think they only look good on Alfa Romeos

Alfa Romeo Disco Volante Spyder
The Disco Volante was the hydrofoil ship owned by Emilio Largo in Ian Fleming’s Thunderball.

Alfa Romeo 4C
Alfa Romeo 4C
A small, impractical 2-seater powered by a tiny, turbocharged engine? Sign me up!

Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio
I’m a secret fan of the new Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio with 505 hp—because 505 hp.
Also, a #$*%&! 6-speed manual.

More Honda

I love the era of racing this car is from. When I envision an open-wheel race car, this is the type of car I imagine.

Honda F1
It even has the right number


Crankiness Rating:
Need to win the Lotto.


Schluß